Wednesday, March 28, 2007

March 29th

Again, I'll feed my tirade about fathers. Why are fathers so frequently idiots? I speak as a man myself, but why are fathers stupid? I work with a lot of families and I frequently hear a father telling a child, in a raised tone of voice, "Don't you raise your voice to me." Obviously what he's modeling is not what he's telling the kid. So MAYBE, (slight chance) the kid will not raise his or her voice to the parental units, but then hollers at the sibling, etc. etc. etc.
IF, for some odd chance, you think that this is not stupid, I have also seen (literally seen, not heard a story about, but literally seen!) the following scenario play out:

DAD: "Do what I tell you to do."
Child: "But ..."
DAD: "DO IT NOW" (In a slightly raised voice)
child: "but..."
DAD: "I SAID DO IT!" (Flat out hollering)
someone else: "Why are you hollering?"
DAD: "I'm not hollering" (in a perfectly normal voice)

What the heck is going through this guy's head? Seriously! I have attempted to reason with these fathers. (As an aside, this is exactly what they continually want me to do with their children, but the child is unreasonable or will not listen to reason... Hmmmmm.) There is some thing put into their brains that has convinced them that they are completely and always right. I cannot fathom this kind of callous disregard for other people's intelligence.

This leads into another philosophy that I have. Everyone knows something better than I do. You, dear reader, might know how to make a leather wallet. You might now how to brew the perfect cup of coffee. You might know how to rewire a 1978 Chevy so that it gets an extra 12 horsepower. You might know where to find the most pocket change lost in the street in any given town. There is SOMETHING that you know better than I do.
I might THINK I know more about ABA and ASD than the average person, but how do I know that you are an average person in this regard? You could have been researching Autism for the past 20 years, and have finally burned out on it an just spend all of your time drinking good coffee and playing chess. You could be an auto expert or a computer genius, and your friends might never realize it!
My point is this: Everyone has value. Everyone is work knowing and befriending. Sometimes people are more difficult to befriend than others, but that doesn't decrease their value as a human being. I have found that some people others find very difficult, just need a little attention. I have been known to befriend "mean old ladies." Turns out they respond well to me because first I find out what they are interested in. I actually listen to what people have to say, and I share their excitement. Try this with your mortal enemy at work. Befriend them, get to know what they like. Find out what they are an expert in! You might think they are incompetant at work, and they might actually factually be incompetant. That doesn't mean that they are a bad person!


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